The Thamensian: ‘Naughty boy’ columnist gets his comeuppance

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NOW then people of Thame, you will have to excuse my husband Mr Thamensian.

He is not the Messiah, he is a very naughty boy sometimes and I was so shocked by his article last week that I have taken his laptop away.

And having looked at is browsing history it is probably for the best.

The reason I have taken over this week is because of his scurrilous, some would say libellous, attack on this very page last week on those of us who went to Lower School East.

Just because he was a snobby Westy I don’t see why he should be allowed to call us names because we went to a bigger, better lower school on the other side of town.

And since he is never very good at research I will also tell you that there were only two lower schools between 1974 and 1995.

West, now the classes at Upper School nearest to the Sports Centre, took in students from places like Thame, Long Crendon and Brill while we were a mix of Thame, Chinnor, Sydenham and even exotic Lewknor students.

Like West we had four houses at Lower School East, Whittle, Hunt, Bannister and Cheshire, and there were inter-house sports and music competitions.

We didn’t need stupid bits of ribbon on our jumpers to denote which house we were in, unlike West.

We could remember that from day to day. And we had a swimming pool.

Because it was a larger site with more pupils the school teams were usually stronger than West and statistically there was very little to choose in exam results.

We basically had the same teachers anyway and you would frequently see them dashing from site to site at break times.

Teachers did seem to mix quite happily, even if the students didn’t: the Six Bells used to be heaving with them all on a Friday night.

When the two schools merged in the fourth year a heady mix of hormones, ‘O’levels and option forms combined in one big happy school year.

Again there were four houses. Cheshire joined with Etherege to make Hampden, Whittle joined with Wood to make Wykham, Hunt joined Rycote to make Harris and Bannister joined with Quartermain (unkindly labelled as Quarterbrain by my idiot husband last week. Sorry Russell) to form New. Probably. Help.

It was, undoubtedly, better to be at East than West, who had the boarders on their site and a chip on their shoulder. We were a proper school, West was just an offshoot.

Right must go now, but beware you lot.

If he steps out of line again I am right here ready to correct him.

And Mr Vicar I will be there at the Music in the Park to stop him heckling you.