Matt Mckeown steps into the spotlight to answer our fiendish questions.
What’s your earliest memory?
Splitting my chin open aged six in Germany while playing with toy cars.
What do you wish they’d taught you at school, but didn’t?
Ignore what you’re doing now - if you could do any job in the world, what would it be and why?
I would like to take over from Bruce Forsyth on Strictly Come Dancing.
Of all the places you’ve been in your life, which would you recommend to a stranger?
Bournemouth hockey tour.
If you could pass one new law tomorrow, what would it be and why?
I’d make it illegal to wear Burberry in pubs. And stop people from fighting.
If you were stuck on Death Row, what would you pick for your final meal?
The Godzilla Challenge at Atomic Burger in Oxford.
And if you could write your own epitaph or come up with famous last words in advance, what would you pick?
Please don’t plank or batman my tomb.
If you could have any super power, what would it be and why?
Anti-gravity. So flying basically then.
How do you relax?
Sport and then pub.
What’s your greatest fear?
Not being able to play sport.
What was the last little treat you bought for yourself, or someone else?
A laptop and a new hockey stick.
What’s the most important lesson that life has taught you so far?
What goes around comes around. Karma exists.
If you could leap forward to the year 2050, what would you expect, or hope to find there?
England to have won the World Cup and Rooney to not have any hair. Again.
Websites you use and value the most ?
Favourite places to eat?
My house, Subway and Le Manoir.
Have you got a favourite shop within 20 miles of Thame town centre?
The James Figg, the Birdcage and Le Cheval Noire. Which is what we call The Black Horse.
You’re taking friends or family out for the day, but you can’t go more than 20 miles from Thame. What’s your recommendation and why?
Atomic Burger in Oxford.
What’s your best kept entertainment or social life secret, or guilty pleasure? Tell us about it.
My mates tell me I go to the gym far too much.
Which person in the public eye would you most like to meet and why?
Dutch penalty corner (hockey) specialist Taeke Taekema. I’d get him to give me a few tips on how to take drag-flicks.
What do you go out of your way to avoid?
People who wear Burberry.
Always leave them laughing - so please tell us a joke
I can never remember jokes.
What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk.